The Creative "No"

During one of my Literary Traditions classes (or Lit Trad as it was commonly known) at UD with Fr. Robert Maguire, we read Madame Bovary. To those who have not read this book, I highly recommend it. It tells the sad tale of a woman who is so out of touch with the blessings that she has in her life that she sacrifices her marriage, baby girl, and life for romantic dreams and affairs that lead to her demise. As a young college student, this book deeply touched me, especially because Fr. Maguire gave a great lecture on women, especially mothers, and the creative “No.”

Many times, women will take on too much, thinking that they have to get everything done, be involved in so many activities with their children, and/or answer yes to every request that comes to them. Father said that by saying yes to everything, women can end up being so drained that they further feel like they’re not doing any one thing well. By saying “No” to some things, this frees her to focus on and concentrate on what takes priority in her life—marriage and her family. Because I do not have children, I have not had to say no to much except when we had things planned or when it interfered with my job which for our family takes priority right now.

Now that we have a little boy living with us and forms part of our family, albeit it temporary, I have had the chance to back out of things that normally I would say yes to in a minute. The twice weekly trips to Tacoma from Poulsbo for the little one take up a lot of time and energy for both him and me. Trying to keep the house clean, get dinner on the table, keep myself organized at work and at home has kept me on my toes. Most of my friends and sisters have been doing this for years. I’m just new to the game, so it has been a challenge.

My point is, though, that the Creative ‘No’ is necessary in every woman’s life. If we try to take on everything without replenishing ourselves with rest, prayer, spending time with children and especially our spouses, then we are running on empty and doing much less than a stellar job.

I think I’ll try to find those class notes from Fr. Maguire’s lecture. Maybe I’ll read Madame Bovary again, too. Life, in its seemingly mundane routine, is quite beautiful. Madame Bovary would have been a happy woman had she realized this.

Prayers for Sew

Prayers and congratulations are in order for my new blogging friend and future foster mom, Sew. She is pregnant! We will pray for a healthy pregnancy and protection for this child.

You can follow her journey through infertility, thyroid cancer, and more right here.

St. Gianna and St. Gerard, pray for us.

Sleepy

We're all sleepy here. John's got a midterm tomorrow and has been studying most of the day and evening. He heads to Seattle tomorrow morning for it. Little man had a good but long week and has a very busy week coming up. Please pray for him. I've got a lot of work and an audit to prepare for and will be driving with Little Man to his appointments next week.

If you could say a prayer for the three of us, that would be great.

Good night!

Skoal

Today is the fifth day we’ve had Little Man. He started day care at a center just a mile from my office. On the way there, I said, “We’re going to school today!” He replied, “Skoal.” Although he was a little shy at first and clingy, he made his way over to a table with toys and got interested in those. When I was walking out, I saw him look for me, but he didn’t cry. Just went back to playing. Hopefully, he’ll enjoy it there for the remainder of the time, and I can get caught up at work.

His teacher, Chelsea, told me that he went down for a nap easily, and had a really good day and had 3 BMs....bingo. Now, I don't want to be one of those people who talks about their (foster)kids mundane bodily functions. However, I must needs give props to the oft mocked prune. Little Man can tend not to process foods too quickly, and was prescribed a laxative a while ago when he came for respite with us a couple of months ago. Thirteen dollars and several doses later, I'm guessing he had success. But why not try something natural first rather than not?

So the other day, when I noticed that he hadn't done his business in a day, I bought a quarter pound of dried plums from the bulk section at Fred Meyer. He got 2 chopped prunes for dessert that night, which he loved. I told John about it and John said, "Hopefully, they'll kick in at daycare." You got that right, brother. Chelsea was so cheerful about the 3 stinking diapers, and I was cheerful that the prunes worked while I was at work. :) Needless to say, I'm happy that his little tummy and pipes are doing the job now, and he's feeling better.

Do you remember that scene in "Dumb and Dumber" where Jim Carrey's character says, "Hey, you want to hear the most annoying sound in the world?" Well, Little Man likes to do this....a lot. If he doesn't get his sippy cup. If dinner isn't ready when he wants it. If he doesn't get his "Teta" which means food or snack to him. It's loud, piercing and in two second intervals. So, tomorrow, when the vulture scream starts, I'll picture Jim Carrey behind me in the carseat.

And believe me, I don't think the sound is annoying when I think that someday all too soon, we won't hear it again. Scream anytime, Little Man.

Changes

Today was an education in the system. While I can't say anything about why we have Little Man, and what's going on (and please don't be offended if you ask and I say, "I'm so sorry, but I can't talk about that") I can say that we are doing what we are called to do: be a safe harbor for a child.

It is a little stressful now, just because I do work full-time and need to have child care lined up by tomorrow. God bless my sister-in-law, Aunty M for watching little man for a couple of hours tomorrow while I go to work and (hopefully) enroll him in childcare which is only one mile from my office.

Little man and I were in the car for over 100 miles today, and let me tell you that he was a major trooper. He's had so many changes in his life the last few days. We love him, and we love even when he throws a legendary tantrum.

I love that I have a husband who is the "Child Whisperer." He is referred to as "Papa John." Each day is day by day because we don't know what tomorrow will bring for us and Little Man. At first glance, I can see that it would be hard to give your heart to a child who may leave soon and whom we may never see again. That is heartbreaking and I can't go down that road right now. However, we would rather love without worrying because people need love now...not just if everything will turn out ok. That is why day-by-day is a God-send. It is a lesson in baby steps and leaning on Him.

It has been 3 days since we have had Little Man, and it has been nice. His bedtime routine is my favorite---not because there's finally quiet time, but because we get to hold him and read to him and say night-night to Jesus, and tell him that we love him very much.

Little Man, te quiero mucho.

Busy Saturday

We have "A" with us this weekend and maybe for a little while longer. He's still sleeping in his crib as I dash around the house cleaning up for another little guest who is coming in a couple of hours. I'm watching my friend's baby for the day as well. We expected the weekend to be quiet, with me watching the baby and John in Seattle for a job fair. Things changed. :) Wish me luck with the two little ones. It's been a minute since I did this.

Happy weekend!

The Coffee Club Diner

On Wednesdays, John takes the later ferry at 7:20 and this means a little extra sleep. Yesterday, however, we decided to have breakfast at a little diner in Bremerton called “The Coffee Club Diner” on Park Avenue. Something about diner food makes me all nostalgic for a time I never lived in and have only heard about from family or seen on tv and movies. Diners make me think of places with delicious comfort food that I normally don’t eat, locals who come in and greet each other by first name and friendly cook and wait staff who keep the coffee coming.

This place hit all the marks. Seating is u-shaped with red stools at the counter. There were booths, as well, as the friendly young waitress told us, but I love sitting at a diner bar. A few men, probably shipyard workers, were eating their breakfasts at the counter as well. John and I ordered the eggs and sausage—his over easy and mine scrambled. It came with choice of toast and choice of potatoes. Oh, potatoes. Some people love sweets, but I love potatoes and have to eat them sparingly. Yesterday morning, I got the home fries and John the hash browns.

The young waitress wasn’t over 20 years old, I don’t think, and was very friendly and provided good service. Since we had a very limited time to eat so that John could catch the ferry, we were pleased that after placing our order, the food arrived in front of us within five minutes. With oldies playing in the background, we at our delicious breakfast and drank a couple mugs of coffee. All too soon, our little breakfast time was over, and it was time to drive the two blocks to the ferry. We hope to go back again maybe for lunch.

For those with no concern about clogged arteries, the Coffee Club Diner has a “Goliath Burger Challenge.” It’s a 5lb burger served with 5 lbs of fries! You have to see the video of how tall this monstrosity is! If you finish all 10 pounds in an hour, you get your meal free, your photo on the wall, and a $25 gift certificate to Minder Meats. If your eyes are bigger than your stomach, it’s $25. I’ll skip that burger because they serve a Monte Cristo sandwich that has my name on it!

If you live in the area, stop by the diner. It’s good food, a nice atmosphere, and a fun way to have a meal.

Address: 417 Park Ave Bremerton, WA 98337

Business Hours:
Monday through Friday - 5:30am to 7:00pm
Saturday - 7:00am to 7:00pm
Sunday - 8:00am to 5:00pm